Day 7 of Thankfulness

Bear with me, today's post is going to be long and full of memories. One of my original intentions for this blog was for to use it to write out some thoughts and work through things that way. Today I need to work my way through some memories of my friend of 38 years, Pam, who died yesterday.

I got the news about a year ago that she had breast cancer. Then about 6 weeks ago I heard it had spread to her brain, lungs, liver, bones.... She was hoping to make it long enough to see her son graduate from high school in May. She didn't make it. My heart breaks for that boy. He had no father in his life.

As it goes with a lot of long-distant friendships, the contact between Pam and I had lessened over the years. We visited her family a couple of times. We emailed occasionally. We heard news about each together through our parents who are friends and live on the same street. I last saw her about 6 years ago when we both happened to be at our parents' for Christmas at the same time. We ran in to each other at Target, of all places. That night, I borrowed my parents' car and picked her up and we went out for coffee. (Well, I'm not a coffee drinker, but it's metaphorical -- you get the idea...) She had recently been divorced so we talked through all that and talked and talked and talked. We stayed until the place started putting the chairs on the tables and cleaning. We got the hint.

I've been really kicking myself for the last day for not doing a better job of keeping in touch. Why is it we get so "busy" (can that be interpreted as selfish?) with our own lives that we neglect relationships. It doesn't matter whether those relationships are right in our own town, or several hundred miles away. The same thing seems to happen. I could go on and on about this excuse of being busy. I'll just say -- you make time for what is important to you. (I'm included in this.)

Pam and I met in the 7th grade. Thirty-eight years ago. I don't recall how our paths crossed. We must have had some classes together that first year of junior high. (Remember when we called it junior high?) I remember by 8th grade she made fun of me for still being in swimming class in P.E., for not testing out. She was a swimmer, swam on a swim team and all. I succumbed to peer pressure and did end up testing out.

We would walk all over town, hang out at Happy Joe's Pizza, McDonald's, Shakey's Pizza and have sleep-overs. We used to walk part of the way home from high school, and stand on the corner where we parted ways and talk and talk and talk. (What do teenagers find so much to talk about??) Before our senior year in high school, her family moved... to a house just down the street from my parents! I used to borrow her oh-so-cool radio headphones when I had to mow the lawn. I used to call her to have her come over when I needed to take a shower and no one else was home. (I had stupidly gone to a stupid, awful, disgusting horror movie and freaked my self out.) Like tiny little Pam could protect me from the imaginary bogie-man! Ha! I used to wander down the street to visit so often I earned the nick-name of "Pesty Neighbor" from her family.  :) They always said it with a smile.

Pam had a pretty ring with a black pearl and a white pearl on it. I just loved it and asked for one from my parents. They gave me one as my high school class ring.

Pam and her sister would get a baby chicken for Easter and I thought that was the coolest thing ever.

Here is a picture of Pam at our high school graduation 32 1/2 years ago. She smiled a lot.

 Then college came and we went to opposite state universities. (I went to the right one. ;) ) We'd see each other when we were home on breaks and during the summer. I think we wrote some letters to each other.

Right after I graduated from college, I got married.  She and her mom hosted a bridal shower for me. Pam and her mom and her sister helped serve cake and punch at the reception.

Even though Hubby and I moved a long ways away, I would still be able to catch up with Pam whenever we visited my parents.

I had babies. She sent the most funnest gift for each of them. (Bad grammar, I know, but it expresses what I mean.) Pam worked at a sporting goods store and gave each of the kids a tiny pair of shoes. She gave Caleb some awesome Reebok high-tops and Megan some adorable pink and white Nikes. I dug through our photo albums yesterday and found a picture of each of them as babies with their shoes on. Hubby bought some Reeboks to match Caleb.

 

I saved those shoes and now I am very happy that I did! (Oh those babies are soooo adorable! I wish I could hold them again!)

When I was pregnant with Megan, I was a bridesmaid in Pam's wedding. I actually found out I was pregnant on my way to her wedding. I had gone to the doctor earlier that day and stopped to call the doctor's office (at a pay phone!) to find out the results. Pam knew I was pregnant before my parents did.

(I have a picture of the whole wedding party, but I don't think I'll post it. The marriage ended several years ago and it was not pretty.)

Here's a shot of me in the bridesmaid dress...keep in mind it was 1989. Very stylish for 1989, don't you think? :)  (Note the matching dyed shoes...)

A funny side story ... Megan wore this dress when she was a senior in high school for a Halloween costume. She was "Deb" from Napoleon Dynamite. (Anyone a fan of that movie?) I wish I could find a better picture of Megan than this...

I never told Pam that her bridesmaid dress ended up being a Halloween costume. I hope she would have found it funny.

I know this is a very long post. I wrote it for me. I have regrets about whether or not I was a good enough friend. I pray I can change that and never have another friend die that I feel that way about.

Her family is bringing her body back to our home town and the funeral will be there later this week. I will be there. Her mom and dad are having a really hard time with this. (What parent wouldn't?) Her sister is too. Pam leaves behind two kids, one in college and one senior in high school. I pray their dad will step in and be a dad to them. They need it.

I miss you already, Pam.

I am thankful for...

...my friend, Pam, of 38 years

...memories

Day 6 of Thankfulness

This is a tough day to write down something I am thankful for.

This morning I learned that the person I have been friends with for the longest time in my life passed away. She and I met when we were in the 7th grade. She had cancer. She learned just 6 weeks ago that it had spread all over.

When I learned the news I went running to my hubby and he cried with me.

I will write more tomorrow about my friend of 38 years.


I am thankful for...
...my husband's tears of compassion.

Day 5 of Thankfulness

Apparently yesterday was Flower Day.

Did anyone else know that?

Fortunately Hubby did (whew!) and he brought flowers home for me.

I am thankful for...
...my sweet, thoughtful, hubby
...the beautiful flowers he brought home for me

Day 4 of Thankfulness

^{Romans 8:35, 36-39}

 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. 

I am thankful for...

...the love of Christ 

...the fact that nothing can separate me from that love.

Day 3 of Thankfulness

This is a model of the city of Chicago.

A couple of days I go I mentioned something about the Chicago River having a history in our family.

Hubby's great-great grandfather, C.J., used to live in Chicago. C.J. was born in England and left there when he was 17. I think he lived in New York at first and then moved to Chicago in 1869. There he began his business of making canvas awnings and tents.

When the great Chicago fire came in 1871, C.J. saw that his "business could be destroyed by the fire, The small stock of cloth which he had on hand and the few sewing machines which he had been able to buy were all that he possessed. Wrapping the sewing machines in the tent cloth, he dumped the entire stock out of a window into the Chicago River and anchored it to a post with a rope. After the fire he drew his stock, practically unharmed, from the water and resumed business in the street. The fire had created such a demand for his wares that he sold all that he had in short order." (Quoted from C.J.'s obituary.)


A year later, C.J. became a Christian after reading the words from John 6:37, "...whoever comes to me I will never drive away." After this he gave himself whole-heartily to the Lord's service. He still ran his tent and awning business, but he spent several nights a week preaching on the streets of Chicago. I've read that he was possibly one of the first to start a mission for homeless people in Chicago, charging a nickle for a cot for the night. And if someone didn't have the nickel, he provided it himself.

In 1887 C.J. moved to Kansas City. "But business was not his object in moving. His object was threefold, First, to print and circulate all the tracts he could, Second, to give all the money he could and Third, to preach the gospel to all he could. The business was only the means to these ends." (Quoted from a copy of an article we have.)

Before C.J. left Chicago, he "selectively approached seven or eight employees and invited them to come with him to Kansas City. He wanted capable tent and awning workers, but it appears that the chief qualification for going to Missouri was their agreement with him on spiritual matters, and their abilities in gospel outreach. Several were excellent singers. One of the men's wives...was an outstanding children's worker." (Quoted from an article I found online about him.)

C.J. had a successful business in Kansas City. His factory had scripture on the walls. His catalogs had scripture across the bottom of every page. He was very concerned about the souls of the people who worked for him. He conducted street meetings. He worked hard all his life. He stated that there was plenty of time to rest in heaven.

I write this here because C.J. is our son's, Caleb namesake (C.J. stands for Caleb Jason), and I admire him and his dedication to our Lord.

I am thankful for...
...the legacy of C.J.
...for the generations of Christ followers
...for this story to be a part of our family

 (I see my husband in the kindness in those eyes.)

Day 2 of Thankfulness

Today is kind of a chilly rainy day so today I am thankful for my new slippers.

I have finally retired my ten-year-old slippers. I've been looking for some new ones for several years and finally found these at Target. I wasn't sure how crazy I was about them at first. I bought them because they fit and didn't have a super hard sole. The more I wear them, the more I like them. What isn't to like about brown cable knit and faux fur??

Conclusion:
I am thankful for...
...warm toes on a chilly day.
...Target.

Day 1 of Thankfulness

In honor of the month of November, I have decided to write a post every day about something I am thankful for. Thirty Days of Thankfulness here we come!

Last weekend we were in Chicago. Such a great city. Our friends, Jackie and Russ,  who we met when we lived in Singapore, invited us to join them for the weekend. We lived in the same neighborhood in Singapore and we went to the same church. We even taught a 10th grade Sunday school class together one year. Jackie had her own car, (most of the rest of us ex-pats only had one car for the family) so she graciously gave me (and others) rides to a lot of activities. We spent quite a bit of time in the car talking and talking and talking. Jackie is the one who asked me if I wanted to take a quilting class with her. So it's her fault, or better yet, it's because of her that I fell into the world of quilting. I am thankful for that.

Anyway...enough back story.

We started off the weekend seeing a friend of our son's. Stephen is going to medical school in Chicago and we were able to find a couple of hours to get together with him. We bought him supper and watched him eat and peppered him with questions. While he was trying to eat. Nice, huh? It is always good to spoil a college kid. We didn't eat with him because we had plans for some great Chicago pizza with Jackie and Russ.

Stephen's meal cost us more than any other meal we ate that weekend, thanks for the "gift" the city of Chicago left us on the windshield of our car. Yippie Skippie. I guess these small town people sometimes forget that in actual big towns, sometimes the city wants money to park a car on their streets. **Sigh**

Anyway.....

We found Jackie and Russ' condo (They have a condo right smack on Michigan Avenue).

Here's a view from the roof of their building.

We dumped off our stuff and headed out for pizza. The pizza was fantastic and the company was even better. It was so good to see them and start getting caught up on each others lives and all our kids.

Saturday we walked down the street for a lovely brunch that we even ate outside, it was such a beautiful day. (That's Russ and Jackie and my hubby.)

 A couple of shots from their condo... Quite a view, huh?

 

The afternoon found us on a Chicago River Architecture Tour.


(Remind me to tell you on another day about how the Chicago River fits into our family history.)

Here's some of the pictures I took.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(And yes, that was just some of the pictures I took on the river tour.)

That evening we had Asian food (appropriate, don't you think, since we met in Asia?)

Saturday night we saw a play on Navy Pier and had some classic Chicago popcorn afterwards.

Sunday morning we worshipped at a branch of Willow Creek Church.
Check out the facility:

The church met in some auditorium in downtown Chicago. It was a wonderful worship service complete with a message from Bill Hybels.

Conclusion:
I am thankful for...
...a fun weekend in Chicago.
...my friend Jackie. I cannot say how much she meant to me during those three years in Singapore.
...being able to see Stephen.
...my hubby who does the majority of the driving on our many road trips.